Q: Why men walk more

A: Coz men have three legs and women have four lips!

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Q: Why do women wear flowered panties?

A: C  O z its their way of saying, ‘In memory of those who were buried here! ‘

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Wife asked her husband how many women he had slept with.

Husband proudly replies, only you my darling, with the others I was awake!!!

so he sits in his dungeon this prison of memories
he has srceamed his lungs out in the end

” she’ll never fuckin win”

On the second day, God created the monkey and said:
“Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this, I ‘ll give you a twenty-year life span.”
The monkey said: “Monkey tricks for twenty years? That’s a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the dog did?”
And God agreed.

On the third day, God created the cow and said:
“You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer’s family For this, I will give you a life span of sixty Years.”
The cow said: “That’s kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. How about twenty and I’ll give back the other forty?”
And God agreed again.

On the fourth day, God created man and said:
“Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, I’ll give you twenty years.”
But man said: “Only twenty years ? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back, that makes eighty, okay?”

“Okay,” said God, “You asked for it.”
So that is why for our first twenty years we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves.
For the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family.
For the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren.
And for the last ten years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.

Life has now been explained to you.

I feel no reprieve, when all I wanted was a lover in you.

It’s the same mistake I make, time after time, You’d think I’d learn all the while I keep getting burned.

And all I wanted was a lover in you.

My heart tends to get the best of me, having nothing but the best of intentions, a runaway train bound for heartbreak.

Driving me insane, wanting to feel nothing when all I can feel is everything.

I’m true to myself, as much as one can be a wide open book for all to read.

No need to hide behind a wall of shame, it’s written all over my face, once again.

With the best of intentions, I wear my heart on my sleeve,

I feel no reprieve, when all I wanted was a lover in you.

It’s the same mistake I make, time after time, you’d think I’d learn all the while I keep getting burned.

And all I wanted was a lover in you.

I want nothing more than to hold you in my arms, kiss you all the while, falling prey to all your charms, lose myself in your smile, while your eyes capture a glimpse of my soul and I’m lost in rapture….

My head in the clouds, and I’m treading air, wanting fantasy to be reality, my soul is bare.

I dream while awake, and tend to think out loud.

I’m riding a speeding bullet, scraping my feet on the ground.

Straight to your heart, I’m hoping to go, skipping each beat, a whirlwind of hope, getting caught in the loop, I’m losing speed and I realise, I’ve lost you along the way.

With the best of intentions, I wear my heart on my sleeve,

I feel no reprieve, when all I wanted was a lover in you.

It’s the same mistake I make, time after time, You’d think I’d learn all the while I keep getting burned.

And all I wanted was a lover in you.

You are gorgeous – But I haven’t met you yet
I remember – But it hasn’t happened yet

And if you believe in dreams – Or what is more important
That a dream can come true – I will meet you

I was peaking – but it hasn’t happened yet
I haven’t been given – my best souvenir

I miss you – But i haven’t met you yet
i know your habits – But wouldn’t recognize you yet

And if you believe in dreams – Or what is more important
That a dream can come true – I will meet you

I’m so impatient – I can’t stand the wait
When will i get my cuddle? – Who are you?

I know by now that you’ll arrive – By the time i stop waiting

I miss you

~Bjork

I can feel you all around me
Thickening the air I’m breathing
Holding on to what I’m feeling
Savoring this heart that’s healed
~Flyleaf

~Flyleaf